Its A New Day

It's A New Day

First Sunday of Christmas

December 28, 2014

Isaiah 61:10-62:3

Luke 2:22-40

There is something amazing about a good story! It manages to draw you into its narrative, make you feel a part and get you emotionally invested in the characters. Growing up I remember the stories of the bible being told in this way. I remember feeling connected and intertwined with the different storylines. I remember being able to recite the stories because they were told in such an engaging way.

The nativity story is familiar to many of us. It is a story we have heard for many years, from different perspectives, yet we still can find new and incredible things in it.

Earlier this week we sat in this sanctuary to sing songs of adoration and love. We sat in this sanctuary to hear yet again the story of a blessed baby who would grow to be the Savior of us all. But today we are not called to sit, rather we must jump with joy! Good news has been proclaimed!  Have you heard it?

Friends, Christ has been born!

See its easy to get wrapped up in the commercialism, the sensationalism of the birth, the Isaiah prophecy fulfilled and forget that Christmas is more than a day. The spirit of Christmas is now among us and we are called to proclaim the miracle and majesty of Jesus and our God.

In our Gospel lesson today we are introduced to two believers-Simeon and Anna. Both were devout followers of God who devoted life and self to the Creator of All. Simeon had been shown by the Holy Spirit that he would see the Messiah of God before he died. He has a personal relationship with God that had been seen through personal and public declarations of devotion and worship. Simeon devoted his life looking for the Messiah, the promise of his people Israel.

"God, you can now release your servant; release me in peace as you promised. With my own eyes Ive seen your salvation; its now out in the open for everyone to see: A God-revealing light to the non-Jewish nations, and of glory for your people Israel."

Rephrased by Eugene Peterson this declaration, this song of Simeon spoken to Jesus and all those around is one that I hope we can make as we go into the world. Friends- Simeon had no preconceived notion of who the Messiah, how he was coming. Rather he was able to accept the Messiah as a baby, giving glory to God for this gift.

Anna like Simeon declares and praises God for this child. Their eyes were not covered or blinded by the world, rather they saw clearly the Messiah.

What do our eyes see after our encounter with Jesus through stories? Through our encounters in this place?

Contrary to medieval artwork Jesus did not have a halo around his head or have choirs of angels around. He was ordinary, just like us! Joseph and Mary had brought him to the temple for a normal ceremony where a traditional rite would occur. They were being good parents under Jewish law. Yet the Holy Spirit working in Simeon and Anna gave them the ability to recognize an ordinary looking baby going through an ordinary ceremony as extraordinary. The Holy Spirit of God transforms our eyes today to see things in a new and different way. To see Christ in ordinary places, in ordinary things; to bring hope to a world in despair.

What kind of Messiah do we look for? What kind of person do we expect to see? Friends I tell you if you expect to see a man in shining robes, arms outstretched you will miss Jesus.

A friend sent me an article about a Methodist Church in California that has an artist design their nativity. This year he depicted Mary as a homeless woman at a bus stop, with all her possessions in a shopping cart, clutching a baby. Not everyone agrees with the depiction but the point is to cause people to see Christmas in a different way, to imagine what Jesus might look like if he had been born today.

In our Isaiah passage we are told by the prophet “I will greatly rejoice in the Lord, my whole being shall exult in my God; for he has clothed me with the garments of salvation he has covered me with the robe of righteousness, as a bridegroom decks himself with a garland, and as a bride adorns herself with her jewels.” (vs 10). We are clothed in garments not of this earth! This is what the season of Advent teaches us, prepares us for. Love, Hope, Joy, Peace are gifts we have been covered with so that on Christmas morning we can go into the world proclaiming Jesus is born, the Messiah is here! Light and hope and joy and peace are born into our world and call us to look at life in new ways.

Amid the ordinary is extraordinary. Church once we look with these new eyes we can see clearly the importance, the specialness, the extra ordinary in everyone we encounter. We can look in the mirror at ourselves and see what God has done, will do and is doing!

So as we prepare for the new year, as we celebrate this first Sunday of Christmas my declaration is similar to Simeon-“God I get it! You are here, you have fulfilled your promise to your people. You are light for all, guiding us amid the darkness. Help me to shine like you, reflecting your glory!”

It’s a new day! Let us proclaim the magnificence of God.

A Unique Mold

A Unique Mold

First Sunday of Advent

November 30, 2014

Isaiah 64:1-9

1 Corinthians 1:3-9

When I was growing up my grandmother made my birthday cake every year.  Every cake was different, extraordinary, extravagant. We never knew what it would look like until she brought it out, yet year after year she managed to surprise and awe me. It was not until I was older and started cooking that I realize the labor of love she did every year. The amounts of detail, the sheer magnitude of each cake were not just hours, but days of commitment and patience. It was always fun to hear about her inspiration and how she finagled some odd shape to complete her vision.  Her drive and determination is something I will never forget, her love for my sister and I, is truly apparent.

As I get older its funny how memories like that one take on a different meaning, a deeper meaning even. My grandmothers molding and shaping is just what God does for each of us. Our Isaiah passage starts off rather harshly proclaiming that "we have all become like one who is unclean, and all our righteous deeds are like a filthy cloth." Yet this proclamation is not the end for any of us. Rather this glimpse into the vengeance of God is a reminder that while we are unworthy and could be considered as such God loves us and cares for us anyway. The prophet Isaiah ends by appealing to God to not judge to quickly because we are his, we are clay worked by the potter’s hands.

We are clay my friends! This means we are dirty, imperfect, and malleable. We are to be shaped and reshaped, formed into the image of God in this world. This is a process. How easy would it be for God to create us all from the same mold? Yet the world would be boring! We are each promised and called to amazing works in Christ, but what does that even mean?

It means that we are not just followers but each partner’s with Christ. To be a partner means that we work together to a greater purpose. In our New Testament lesson Paul is writing to the people of Corinth. This community is full of many people from all walks of life. This community is by no means perfect but Paul is proud of them. I love how he addresses his brothers and sisters "I give thanks to my God always for you because of the grace of God that has been given you in Jesus Christ". Always? Really? But friends how different would this correspondence be without this piece? Paul gave them encouragement, reminded that God is faithful, and reminded them that they have been blessed with a variety of gifts. But "I give thanks for you"-was it even necessary!?!

I puzzled over this as this week unfolded. With the decision in Ferguson, the violence that has followed, protests during Black Friday, holiday travel and thanksgiving all occurring in this world how do these words ring true today?? As I explored this text and read commentaries and articles about these passages, one person wrote "We might employ this affirmation during Advent in place of the exchange of peace. Who knows what might happen if the strangers, friends, enemies and indifferent parties who make up any congregation on a Sunday morning could say this to one another, and discover that they mean it?"

Oh beloved that shook me, how can I thank God for someone when they have taken a life? How can I thank God when a parent is mourning the loss of a child? How can I thank God for someone when I don't have my stuff together? How can I thank God for someone I don’t like or agree with? How, how, how?

But how can you not?

Friends these scriptures are meant to shake us, wake us from our complacency and call us to question what we consider "normal". But they are also meant to provide us with one of the greatest tools, hope. In my email to the young adults this week I wrote, "Yet amid my confusion, frustration and anger there is a glimmer called hope...I continue to hope; hope for a world full of equality and love, a world of peace and joy, a world that God will be proud of."

During this season of Advent, this season of preparation, how do we as a hopeful people live out what God has called us to do? Beloved we live, we trust in Gods power and presence, we take on an attitude of clay-ready to be shaped for what God needs us and calls us to do.

Friends when we leave this place I challenge you to adopt a thankfully spirit, one where we greet each person, not just in this place but in every place, with an attitude of gratitude. For in each of us is the desire for better, hope for futures that look brighter than the dimness of today. I hope during this season that when the star appears and wherever it leads us that we are transformed.

Creator God, you are the potter, we are the clay. You form us in your image. Shape our spirits by Christ’s transforming power, that as one people we may live out your compassion and justice in this world, that as one people we may love one another, that as one people our actions and interactions lift the realm of your peace. Amen

An Intentional Adventure

An Intentional Adventure

Twentieth Sunday after Pentecost

October 26, 2014

Deuteronomy 34:1-12

Matthew 22:34-46

This past summer we took a trip to Boston where I challenged myself to take a true vacation. The last two times I had been there I was there for a specific reason so I had no free time. During this trip I had all the time I wanted, since Adam had workshops to attend all day. It's very rare that we travel and I don't have an agenda or responsibilities. So I walked, a lot. I got a pass for the T and a fairly detailed map and got to explore. I had time frames and some dinner plans but for four days my time was mostly my own. I must admit I got lost at times, got turned around and walked to far off my path but in the end I saw every site I wanted, explored the entire city and learned to navigate the T.

During this trip I also got to reflect on the last couple of months, my life and all the changes that had happened. As I walked I talked to God. We talked about my journey, my ministry and its goals, the steps I have taken and need to take. Through it all I was reassured that I'm headed in the right direction. Yet I was also reminded that this journey, like my walking, wouldn't be perfect and there would be detours, deviations and unplanned turns.

In our Old Testament lesson today we see Moses at the end of his life's journey. We met Moses as a baby who was raised as a prince of Egypt. Watched Moses find out his birthright and then run away after killing an overseer. We saw Moses run into the desert, find refuge among the tribe of Jethro in the land of Midian, and marry. We observed Moses as he experienced the awesomeness of God in a burning bush and heard the words of God charging him to help free the Israelites, "let my people go". We know how Moses tried to get out of the job but God promised to be with him. We know how he had to be the instrument of The Lord to bring plagues to Egypt. We know how pharaoh finally relented and the people had to leave quickly with whatever they could carry. And then we saw pharaoh change his mind and chase after these people. We know God sent a strong wind to part the Red Sea and that Pharaohs army was drowned. And yet after all of this, THIS is where the journey truly began.

For the next forty years Moses led the people of Israel to the Promised Land. Moses acted as mediator between the people of God trying to keep everyone happy. He never thought of himself as a leader, never wanted to be a leader. Moses was only on this crazy journey because God called him to go. Yet Moses seemed to be the only one not questioning the motives of God. Moses had unfailing trust in the God who had led them thus far.

Like Moses and the Israelites we are continually striving towards Promised Land. Promised Land is not necessarily a plot of earth but it’s an ideal, a goal, a dream we have for self. If you pick a profession there are certain steps you take and sometimes you are so focused on that goal and doing any and everything to get there. But like the Israelites we so easily forget to savor the journey, we're more interested in the bigger and better. It’s easy to look past the moment to the goal or even not to look anywhere because it’s too overwhelming. Friends, we all started as Moses of his youth, telling God we aren't ready, we can’t do this, there’s no way anyone will listen to our story, our advice. Yet God stands there ready to walk with us, with steadfast love for us.

In our New Testament we are reminded by Jesus that love is the greatest commandment. The Pharisees ask what the greatest law is and friends I believe what they are really asking is “what does it take to live as a person of faith?” This is a question we each ask today. To live as a person of faith requires love. This love we are called and commanded to does not mean a cookie-cutter type of love. It doesn’t mean writing love letters, exchanging gifts or celebrating superficial days. Rather we are called to each balance our identities as we learn to and continue to love God, neighbor and self. But friends this love is a process and also a daily challenge. A challenge to model Jesus in action, not just words. Do we challenge each other to model Jesus, where we love ALL our neighbors?

How appropriate is our theme for stewardship this year; “What Love Can do”.  Personally I have been blessed each week by our commitment minute, and last week especially by the witnesses shared by our laity. During each of these moments I have been reminded that love is part of the journey we call life. The stories shared have all mentioned a reason why, a person who, a moment when love was a part of the agenda. These stories have shaped the journeys we walk, the lives we live and the people we are. If life is a journey it doesn't have to be a grueling trip. It can be an adventure.

So beloved-what can love do? The love of God for his people caused them to be freed and provided for amidst their groaning’s. The love of Moses for his people caused him to continually intercede between them and God. The love of Moses for God caused him to maintain hope when things seemed hopeless. The love of Jesus to those who despised him and caused him pained challenged them to do better. As cliché as it sounds love can change the world!

We need to strive for excellence- not perfection! This excellence calls us to hold one another accountable, to be intentional in our relationships with friends and strangers, to love those who seem unlovable.  These things make up our journey of faith. When we truly and freely give love we are opening ourselves to a life full of excitement, unexpected opportunities and adventure!

So like my travel to Boston I am preparing for this journey. I have a map and a general idea of where I’m going but my goodness I am ready for an adventure too.

It’s amazing what love can do, isn’t it?!?

Letting Go

Letting Go

Sixteenth Sunday after Pentecost

September 28, 2014

Exodus 17:1-7

Philippians 2:1-13

Friends, I stand before you this morning to admit I’m imperfect. I know, I know you’re all thinking “that cant be possible” but it is! And I think this is the beauty for each of us as we sit here this morning, imperfection. Now don’t get me wrong imperfection doesn’t mean wrong or bad, rather it means unlimited potential, possibility and opportunity. While some of our imperfection is things that cant be helped, the other part is because we cant let go of preconceived notions and ideals of how life, situations, etc SHOULD be.

In our Old Testament today we find the Israelites who we have read about all month. We find them today still at the beginning of their journey in the wilderness. These people had spent generations in slavery and the Lord sent Moses to help them break free. After numerous plagues orchestrated by God Pharaoh let them go. Yet as they were leaving, tasting a bit of freedom, Pharaoh changed his mind and sent his soldiers after them. Still God provided and allowed Moses to split the red sea so that these Israelites could get to freedom. We find them in todays reading several months and miles into their journey. God had provided them with food and water when their supplies ran out but these people were tired. I can imagine that many people were asking “Are we there yet?” These hungry, thirsty and tired people were frustrated, scared, and feeling unsure in the man and the God they had put their trust in.

 “Is the Lord with us or not?”

They became dissatisfied with the direction things were going. They expected their new beginning to be filled with blessings and pretty things.  They began to wonder if God had even heard their prayers. They quickly forgot all God had done to bring them to this place of freedom. Rather they went to Moses filled with imagined wrongs and unrealistic expectations because they had no idea what was happening, and the unknown is terrifying.

Like the Israelites we sometimes let our situations influence our faith in God. In the moment we get so wrapped up we forget to remember the amazing things God has done, is doing and will do. This cry for proof of Gods presence is a challenge to Gods authority and love for us. God who has provided for these people, time and time again is being question. Yet God in his infinite mercy understands that our humanness causes us to want proof, even when there is no reason not to trust in the Lord. So God provides fresh water, in the presence of the elders. And Moses names the place after this encounter as a reminder for all of  this point in their journey.

Friends when we ask this question about God we are putting human limitations on an almighty God. We are asking for miracles but telling God to do it according to OUR parameters. We need to let go of this mindset, if we don’t we don’t allow God to work through us. Why wouldn’t God be with us?

Our Philippians passage is the answer to this question from the Israelites. The answer is a resounding YES. God is with us, God is standing with us as we go through good and bad times, God is leading, guiding and walking alongside us on this journey called life. In this passage we see that Paul is giving advice to the community in Philippi. We don’t know what the problem is or how extensive the hurts are but we have the words of Paul. These people, and us today, are called to adopt the attitude of Jesus. Jesus the friend to the poor and needy.  Jesus who eats with sinners and tax collectors, Jesus who preaches the word of God unashamed.

When we adopt the attitude of Christ we allow the work of God to be carried out in this world. We let go of trying to please those around us. We let go of the parameters set for us by society. We let go and let in the amazingness that is God. How we interact with one another changes for the better and we are able to make decisions that benefit everyone not just “me”.

I am letting go of the societal expectations of being a woman, of being in my 20s, of being in ministry. I need to let go because when I let go I let in God.

Is the Lord with us or not? Yes, yes, yes! God is waiting for us to unabashedly throw up our hands and release the things that control us. We need to let go of the hold society has on us, we need to embrace being imperfect creatures who serve a perfect God. In the words of Paul we need to “actually live out Gods good purposes”. As you go through this week I ask you to let go, God is waiting, wont you trust?

Amen

For Everyone

For Everyone

Twelfth Sunday after Pentecost

August 31, 2014

Exodus 3:1-15

Romans 12:9-21

During July I wrote a daily devotional for the young adults. There were predetermined weekly themes geared at reenergizing our faith and relationships. I chose to write from the heart and make the devotionals personal rather than academic. Those weeks were some of the scariest for me. I felt unworthy and unsure; I didn't feel like my writing was good enough and I was petrified that the stories shared would mean nothing. But I knew from praying about this devotional series that a personal reflection was the way to go, that this was my opportunity to forge bonds and make deeper connections with our young adults.

As we read the Moses story I am amazed at his ready admittance to imperfection and unworthiness. Moses, a former prince of Egypt, now works in the dessert for his father in law herding sheep. Moses used to finery and an abundance of clothing is now content with simple robes and sturdy sandals. Moses who once worshipped many gods in Egypt is being called by the God of his ancestors to help free those he once oppressed.

This man for all intents and purposes was not the right man to carry out the work of God, to stand up for the injustices of the Israelites. Moses had had slaves, had killed an Egyptian overseer, had run away from responsibility and judgment, and had gone from favored grandson of pharaoh to outlaw. Yet God in a strong, firm voice called him by name.

Friends, so many times we are Moses. We hear a call and look to God with disbelief, asking "who am I?" We feel unsure, imperfect, unworthy. Yet the God of our ancestors looks at our heart and calls us each by name. In our hearts we can find things we are passionate about; causes, activities, organizations, individuals. Each of things are to be acted on. There are many times I question where God wants me to go or do but am continually reminded that in all times I am to act out of love. The Romans passage read “let love be genuine; hate what is evil, hold fast to what is good; love one another with mutual affection”. We are called to be real players in this thing called life; to be honest, and real amid our imperfection and unworthiness.

"I have seen the misery of my people in Egypt, I have heard them crying out because of their slave drivers, and I am concerned about their suffering." (Exodus 3:7) God had seen the suffering, that is certain, and while I gather it would be easy to smite everyone that is not who God is. God realizes the only way to save his beloved children is if they rise together. God has seen that Moses is offended, bothered and appalled by the injustice of the Israelites. God has seen that Moses hurts for these people and wants to see fairness and righteousness for all those enslaved. But instead of forcing Moses he causes Moses to realize there needs to be a response to the injustices, and the response is him. A burning bush grabs Moses attention, a representation of the fire for justice in his heart. Although he stutters and is filled with doubt God tells Moses "I will be with you" reminding him that he is not alone.

As I've read news articles these past weeks I've been amazed at the numerous responses to injustice in the world. We have seen protests, violence, petitions, speeches, letters, politicians and individuals rallying together. Yet something that has been drastically missing is stories about good in the world. I know it's there. I've seen it in action. I've witnessed acts of kindness, hospitality to strangers, love for those that society has deemed unlovable. And I’ve realized that as much as our media and society displays a disjointed and segregated world we still have proof of individuals doing the work of God in this world, working for Gods kindom.

God tells Moses “I am who I am… This is my name forever, and this my title for all generations”. God is love, God is mercy, God is trust, God is hope, God is peace, God is justice, God is. As the children of God, a free people, we are tasked with doing the work of God. To love the unlovable, to show mercy to those in need, to be a safe haven, to encourage, to promote peace and unity. When we begin to set aside our personal ambitions and desires we are able to see the plight of the other and act on it. And because of this we are all called to show God to the world.

The hymn before the sermon was a plea of sorts, a request we should continually ask of God, “Lord speak to me that I may speak”. Like Moses we don’t always have the words to share or to support our claims, but we are tasked to do the work of God in this world. May God speak to you and further you to act for justice, fairness, righteousness, and equality in this world. May you walk with the confidence that God is. May all this be done in God’s name, in our imperfection, our unworthiness, for everyone.

Sermon: For Just a Time as This

For Just a Time as This

Tenth Sunday after Pentecost

August 17, 2014

Genesis 45:1-15

Romans 11:1-2a, 16-21, 29-32

When I was in college I attended the midweek services held at the theological school. Occurring 3 days a week, these services were open to everyone, never lasting more than an hour. I stumbled across this service one day and began attending regularly. These midweek services were such a pick me up amid papers to be written, tests to be taken and various commitments. They helped to center me and focus me. They also helped me to form connections with individuals who helped me affirm my call in ministry.

See I had avoided this call for a while. I preached my first sermon at 14, led worship for various events, facilitated small groups in high school, and got involved with the non-denominational Christian group on campus within a month of starting college. Yet I still resisted about what I was called to do. It was easier to say “it’s not for me”, “I must be misunderstanding God” or even “I’m too scared to do this”. But as time has gone on I have slowly let down my walls and guard and allowed God to work.

During my junior year I got introduced to the Communities of Shalom. This group sponsored by the United Methodist Church and housed at Drew University began as a response to the conditions and aftermath of the Los Angeles riots in 1992. Communities of Shalom trains and equips local ministry teams in asset-based and collaborative approaches to systemic change, economic prosperity, healing and health and sustainability.[1]Essentially you are trained to become a community organizer for a pre-determined zone. The Shalom Zone model has been replicated throughout the United States and around the world.

As an undergraduate the Shalom program was not really open to me. But after discussion and approval of the deans I was able to go through certification to become a Shalom minister. That summer I got placed in Washington State to work with a homeless feeding program organizing volunteer involvement and programming. The original position transitioned into so much more and provided interactions with those who were struggling but still maintained their faith and trust in God despite their situations. I learned so much that summer about ministry and about myself. It shifted how I acted and reacted to certain circumstances and allowed me to enter my senior year knowing seminary was the next step after graduation.

Starting seminary and continuing has been an adventure in itself but through it all I have been affirmed and reminded of my calling and the path God has laid for me. I have tried to encourage, nurture and learn more about my gifts, and I don’t think I will ever be able to stop doing this.

Our Romans passage tells us “for the gifts and the calling of God are irrevocable”. To have something be irrevocable means not able to be changed or reversed, to be permanent. We ALL have gifts, strengths, and skills that are part of us and are meant to be shared with the world. The interactions we have with others at different parts of our lives help to shape and mold us into the fullest beings we can be. By ignoring what God has tasked us with I believe we will always feel like a part of us is empty or unsettled. If God has granted you with a skill he will help you to truly express it. What is God calling you to do?

In our Old Testament lesson we continue our story from last week about Joseph. We find Joseph reconnecting with his brothers years after they sold him into slavery and after he has raised in ranks of the Egyptian government. With this new position of power we might expect to find a changed Joseph, one who is cold and authoritative. I expect him to yell, scream, tell his brothers how terrible they are, have the Egyptians thrown them in prison, or even kill them. Yet we find a man so overcome with his joy at seeing his brothers he weeps loudly, a Joseph who has come to terms with their actions, one who sees the hand of God in this whole adventure.

Eight chapters earlier we are introduced to Joseph. He is his father’s favorite son, He ticks off his brothers because he has symbolic dreams of them bowing to him and they hate him. Joseph’s ability for interpretation was what saved him in Egypt. By correctly interpreting and guiding Pharaoh Joseph is taken care of and given a high position. This power allows him to take care of his family during an intense drought. His interpretations allowed for planning to occur seven years earlier. It was not an instant solution; rather actions were taken place over time for the right time. In all of these ups and downs Joseph continues to look to God for help and guidance, un-wavering.

Each of us and our lives have purpose. Are we leaving to fulfill this? A woman I know from college has been inspiring me recently. I only knew her through others but thought she had such a beautiful spirit. Almost 4 months ago she began to sell head wraps. She designed them and sewed them and started selling a few at a time. The response to her creation was enormous. In these short months she has expanded to jewelry, head chains, skirts and t-shirts. While her products are beautiful I think it’s the message behind that is really inspiring. She has named her company “Fanm Djanm” which means “strong woman”. Her belief is “that there are strong women everywhere. Some know their strength, and others haven't yet figured theirs out. This brand is to empower women from all walks of life to be bold, beautiful, and powerful.”[2] Many have been inspired by her mission, realizing their worth and encouraging others to realize the same. Her mission is inspiring but also a challenge of sorts for us. Does our life have a mission?

In a world that seems to be going crazy with violence and hatred among strangers, communities, neighbors and friends, what are we doing to encourage peace? What actions are we taking to build each other up? There are so many things we have each been gifted with to use. These gifts may not always be gifts of song or public speaking, maybe you are a great listener, or you work well with children, or you are intentional with friendships and nurturing them. Are you recognizing these gifts for the beauty they hold?

As we prepare for a new church year have you been wrestling with getting involved with a ministry here? Have you been questioning your job or relationships? Pray on them, question yourself, honor the gifts you have been given. Begin to do something or get involved with something that makes your soul smile.  I encourage you in the words of Joseph “Hurry”. You are prepared and preparing for just a time as this.

---

[1] www.Communitiesofshalom.org

[2] http://www.fanmdjanm.com/about/

Joy in the midst of Grief

This past week I went to a viewing with my fiance. It was a friend of his, a football brother from the first team he played on in college. This friend was young, in his early 30s with young kids. His death was tragic and unexpected. I went to support and be there for my love and try to be strong when he could not.

As he said his goodbyes to this friend and reminisced with other football brothers a wail arose from the mother; there is nothing quite as shattering as the cry of a mother who is preparing to bury her child. As the receiving line continued past her the wailing subsided and amid the tangible grief in the room she laughed.

It was a short burst and if you weren't paying attention you could have missed it. Yet it reminded me there is joy in grief; joy as you go over memories, see friends and family who you have lost contact with, meet those who loved your love one as you did. It also reminded me that not only in grief, but in everything we do we should give into our emotions. This mother went through a spectrum of emotions and will continue to but she is allowing herself to  feel.

We get so good in society bottling up our anger, frustrations and even joys. But we are not living out as our intentional selves. I challenge us to allow our self to feel in the moment, allowing nothing to be bottled up.

Re-Devotional: July 28-31 Re-energize

July 28th

ReEnergize

"you are snared by the utterance of your lips, caught by the words of your mouth." 

Proverb 6:2 (NRSV)

As I've gone through this month of devotional writing I have learned more about my faith, but more importantly about me. I've realized while I've fed my leadership I haven't always fed my self, I've allowed work to prioritize relationships, among other things. As the above passage shows I have made promises or stated things without follow up or intention of doing so. But none of these ways are me, rather I had let life get in the way of living.

Over the last few weeks we've had numerous events where my entire intention was to have low key events that highlight the awesomeness of our city. We've explored Governors Island, hung out afterwork, went dancing on the HighLine, played mini golf on Randall's Island, supported the theater camp, and had brunch with pastor Cathy. Each of these events, and the planned august ones, are allowing us to get to know each other outside of Sunday. This is so important for the church as a whole. We need to not be a people who part ways Sunday but ones who live out the relationships formed on Sundays. 

I am so grateful that I got a reality check these last few weeks. I pray that you have been challenged to think about your interactions, reactions and relationships differently. Thank you for journeying with me. 

Magnificent God may we live lives more fully to show your kingdom on earth. Amen.

July 29th

ReEnergize

There's something so fun about using filters on pictures. A filter can add emotion or a mood. I must admit when I started on Instagram I would spend so much time trying to find the perfect filter for every picture I posted. Over time I stopped caring about the filters used or cropping it perfectly and just cared about sharing memories. I got to connect with friends from high school and share fun moments and milestones with my family who live out of state. Now it's rare that I use filters for my photos.

In my relationships and interactions I used to think an increase of time was what was important. I would spend so much time going to things and planning multiple get togethers in a day. As I've grown I've learned that intentional moments are more important. I try to plan get togethers with nothing after so I can extend time if necessary. I try to be fully present, not focusing on other things that take me out of the moment.

In my life I hope to live fully, not adding things just to add but living as much in the moment as I can. May we each be intentional in all we do.

Holy One may we be intentional, not crowding our lives with fluff. Amen

July 30th

RE-ENERGIZE

One of my favorite thing about staying at a hotel is that they remake the bed every day. Growing up my dad was a stickler that we should always make our bed before leaving the house. I remember having to remake the bed if it wasn't made "right". In high school my daily bed making skills started to fall by the wayside since I was constantly on the go. In college I made sure the quilt was relatively straight. As I've gotten older I must say coming home to a made bed is one of life's simple pleasures.

In my faith life I've also learned that it's the simple things that are the most lasting. One of the practices I've tried to stick to is praying in the moment. It's so easy to say "yes I'll pray for you" and forget to do it. It's harder but simpler to pray in the moment, meeting someone in their immediate request.

Today I challenge you to pray in the moment, either with the person or immediately after you learn about the situation needing prayer.

Great God help me to live in the moment, turning to simpler practices that draw me to you. Amen

July 31st

RE-ENERGIZE

A friend posted on fb the other day:
 

"yesterday I was making excuses to a friend about not having time to workout and they said to me 'there's no other way?'. So today's message on getting to your goals: make another way. It's just that simple."

It was a huge affirmation for me. Every time I've been unhappy or felt like I wasn't using my potential it's because I did what I was supposed to do, not what felt right. On the flip side when I've done what felt good in my heart I have been happy and everything felt like it was going towards my goals and dreams. As we continue through life making decisions about jobs, living arrangements and relationships I hope we all make decisions that lead to the ultimate goals we have set for ourselves.

Holy one help me to make a way so I can achieve my dreams and goals. Amen
 

Re-Devotional: July 21-27 Retrace

July 21^st

Retrace

Over time I've realized how important repetition is to truly understand something and make it stick. The first time I made my moms potato salad I freaked out that I couldn't do it. I've eaten this salad for years, yet had no confidence that I could make it myself. But as I began to prep ingredients and mix things together I began to remember each time I made it with her and the little tricks she had. Things were familiar and when it was done it tasted just like hers.

In my faith journey whenever I start a new devotional or a study group I get nervous that I won't get anything from it. But my involvement in the process is what makes the difference. I must remember that I know there is something that can speak to me if I ready myself for it. I must remember that my faith is not made up of one experience but multiple moments. I must remember to retrace my steps, and move forward.

Lord may I strive to learn from the things in my past to make me better for you. Amen

July 22^nd

Retrace

When I was younger my mom had us walk everywhere. We would walk to museums, to play dates, to school or to the park. My favorite times when we were in the park and mom let us choose random paths to follow. Sometimes the paths were paved, sometimes they were pure dirt. You could tell which paths were commonly used, which were rarely used, and which had been created over time. With each path you tend to wonder who walks them and why. As I've gotten older it's been fun to walk past some of these paths I explored and think about the adventures had.

I recently stumbled across a prayer journal I had in high school and came across a quote from Shel Silverstein's The Giving Tree that I had felt was so relatable then and still applies today:

"And after a long time the boy came back again.

"I am sorry, Boy," said the tree, "but I have nothing left to give you-

My apples are gone."

"My teeth are too weak for apples," said the boy.

"My branches are gone," said the tree.

"You cannot swing on them-"

"I am too old to swing on branches," said the boy.

"My trunk is gone," said the tree.

"You cannot climb-"

"I am too tired to climb," said the boy.

"I am sorry," sighed the tree.

"I wish that I could give you something... but I have nothing left. I am an old stump. I am sorry..."

"I don't need very much now," said the boy, "just a quiet pleace to sit and rest. I am very tired."

"Well," said the tree, straightening herself up as much as she could,

"well, an old stump is a good for sitting and resting. Come, Boy, sit down. Sit down and rest."

And the boy did.

And the tree was happy."

I challenge you to do something that brought you joy as a child and find something to do as an adult that brings that same joy!

Ever present God help me to hold fast to memories that bring happiness to my life. Amen

July 23^rd

Retrace

So I must admit that one of my favorite movies is Chocolat. I pretty much drop everything when it comes on TV and regrettably I loaned my copy to someone senior year of college and never got it back. One of my favorite story lines is the narrative of why they wander. The north wind pulls them, uproots them even, leading to a history of no real connections with others, just the knowledge of chocolate and its ability to affect love, health and other relationships among individuals. Although a fictional account our main actress plays her part of knowledgeable chocolatier so well. Her knowledge is part of her, a way she relates to her ancestors and connects to her late mother.

As I prepare to get married I've gotten to hear stories of grandparents and great grandparents, adventures during childhood, and amazing memories of trips from my future-in-laws. Its been lovely to experience these memories for the first time and get excited to make my own memories with this extended family. Memories are a great way to share pieces of your heart with others.

May you find the courage to share your favorite memory with a friend.

Holy one we are grateful for the gift of remembering. Help us to share the stories that make us, us. Amen

July 24^th

Retrace

When I have lost something the worst thing you can say to me is "well did you look at the places you were" or something to that affect. Its frustrating because it usually is in the one place I forgot about that the lost thing was left...

And in this same way when I feel low in my faith and someone tells me to read the bible or pray about it I get frustrated beyond belief. I think its frustrating because I know thats what I should do and its also obvious thing to do. But we need to retrace our steps sometimes, not because we've forgotten but because we need a reminder.

May we have the courage to go back to the familiar and start again.

Lord help me to retrace my steps to remind me of my beginnings and my possibilities, Amen 

July 25^th

Retrace

I went to a conference yesterday. It was about exploring the rhythm of worship in music and word-the heartbeat of God. The theme for this conference was based off a NPR talk where they shared that music syncs our heart with those around us, there is a shared rhythm created. During the keynote we were asked how do we engage one another so our heartbeats sync? There was no golden answer, rather we were challenged to be vulnerable and that this syncing requires risk.

As we went through the rest of the day and all the workshops I was challenged to think about times I have and have not taken risk. I was reminded of the fear of being vulnerable. I was encouraged that I need to be willing to be open and willing to change, acting out of faith.

How many times have each of us let fear and uncertainties control us and our decisions? We cannot change past actions but we can push forward when fear starts to take hold.

May we think of how we can continually move forward for better relationship with self, others and God.

Holy one, three in one, help me to sync to the heartbeats around me finding mutuality with all. Amen

July 26^th

Retrace

My favorite hymn is Hymn of Promise. I have loved this song since I was six and even plan on having it sung at my wedding in a few weeks. The song talks about the changes that happen in seasons, in animals and in our lives,. Yet within these changes there is a promise of newness and beauty emerging. For me its such a reminder that God reveals and fulfills promises in her time, not mine.

A friend of mine posted on instagram the other day that she had created a new vision board. For as long as I have known her she has had one of these. On it she posts pictures, phrases, and quotes that inspire her to reach a particular goal. In college her board consisted of a diploma, the date of our expected graduation, a house, a list of schools she was looking at for her masters and  numerous other things. The goal was getting into a master program. As she fulfilled many of her goals or created numerous new ones a new vision board was created. 

Like this friend we all create vision boards, they just arent always physical. We have all prayed for things, new adventures, and new relationships but God in his infinite wisdom shows us the answers to these things when its the proper time. May we each remember our visions for our lives "unrevealed until its season, something God alone can see"*.

Holy one, help me to rely on your time and to continually have new visions for life. Amen.

*Hymn of Promise, UMH #707
 

July 27^th

Retrace

I love looking through old pictures. There's something awesome about remembering every event and moment or hearing stories about pictures you don't know about. When I was growing up my mom used to go through family pics whenever we asked. Through her stories I got to learn about my grandmother and other family members. 

When I read the bible I love the numerous stories we are given. The different aspects of God we are introduced to remind me of the Holy Ones awesomeness and complexity. Yet we are also reminded that God is able to respond to all our issues and situations. I am comforted knowing I have a God who understands every fear, joy and in between emotion.

May we always aim to listen to the stories told to us.

Lord may I remember that you are able to meet all my needs. Amen

Re-Devotional: July 14-20 Renew

July 14^th

Renew

When I was about 12 I had a fascination with names. I wanted to know meanings and origins, popularity  and rank over the last few years. When I got my first bible I thought it was a good idea to try and highlight all the names in the Old Testament...let me tell you the genealogies in genesis cause the entire page to get highlighted. Through my highlighting  I stumbled across the story of Abram and Sarai

Their renaming to Abraham and Sarah was representative of new beginnings and a new covenant. God had a purpose for them for future generations and the names signified this. While we may not change our names when we enter into a new relationship of faith our souls are changed.

May we each experience change that feels like our names have been changed.

Holy one help us to renew our lives so we are new in you. Amen

July 15^th

Renew

Last night I watched the rain come down. It would pour and you couldn't see down the block, and then it would let up and you had to look so close to see the drops. As I watched I saw leaves and garbage cans and other random things float down the street, and I realized how different everything would look in the morning.

In my life I like to believe there are rainstorms that clear out the unwanted people and things and allow for newness. These rainstorms aren't always terrible things but they are situations that allow for revelation  and change. 

May there be rainstorms in your life that lead to newness.

Lord may we welcome change and new things whenever they come our way. Amen

July 16^th

Renew

"Finish each day and be done with it. You have done what you could. Some blunders and absurdities have crept in; forget them as soon as you can. Tomorrow is a new day. You shall begin it serenely and with too high a spirit to be encumbered with your old nonsense."

-Emerson

The best thing about a new day is the fact that you have a clean slate. Sometimes we abuse "tomorrow", pushing everything there with no regard in doing the thing we put there. But tomorrow is here!

Today I challenge you to live to your fullest. You are the smartest, best, most wonderful person right this moment. We are able to begin again every day leaving our fears, doubts and failures behind, ready to start again as a wiser person.

May you embrace today as a day of new beginnings.

Revitalizing God stir in me new things that let me let go of the old. Amen 

July 17^th

Renew

Recently most of the building smells like paint and sawdust on a daily basis. There are so many awesome changes happening this summer at PAUMC and its amazing to see there evolution. To see the removal of a wall, new flooring, the construction of our new elevator, I am in awe of the difference being made!

So many of the changes are necessities, adjusting to the changes of our growing congregation and new needs with programming. This renewal of our physical building is a reminder to me that time to time we all need renewal. This renewal can be physical, emotional and physical.

For me I clean when life feels unbalanced. I will deep scrub the oven, file and organize loose paperwork, vacuum every rug and couch-do the most intense cleaning I can. For me I feel the most renewed and rejuvenated when I do this. It makes me feel ready, able to take on anything.

We need to do things that make our souls and space around us feel nurturing, and encourage us to do the best we can.

Lord may we make shifts to renew ourselves, creating new goals for a better life. Amen

July 18^th

Renew

I love to go vintage clothes shopping. There's something awesome about finding something for a fraction of what it originally cost or finding something perfect to reinvent. When I was at college there were two thrift shops in town that sold vintage clothing. A lot of the stuff was higher end and I loved going in during sales. One day I struck a conversation with the woman behind the counter of my favorite of the shops. I found out she was one of the co-owners. She was older, probably in her 50s, and I asked her why she decided to open this shop. She told me that she had started out working in corporate gigs, and while the money was good she didn't feel fulfilled, rather she was feeling drained.

A friend and her decided they wanted to open a store, they had no small business experience but had a desire to make it work and opened the business with a little faith. They had been open for almost 10years at this point. I asked her how she managed to maintain such high quality merchandise. She said that every week she would go through donations, and they also had a high standard of what could be donated. She told me that their biggest reason for success was that she and her co-owner weren't unwilling to get their hands dirty and be involved in even the smallest process.

I try to think about this little bit of wisdom when I get nervous or scared about new adventures. Renewing moments in life means we begun again.

May we have the courage to begin again.

Lord let me be encouraged and have courage to push forward, trying new things and creating new adventures. Amen.

  

July 19^th

Renew

The office I share at PAUMC is pretty full with paperwork, toys, art supplies and other random things. One of the most common in the random category is toilet paper rolls. We have a decent stockpile that we continually add to. The kids have made various crafts with these rolls and I love seeing the creative things they turn into.

This transformation reminds me how the ordinary can be repurposed to extraordinary. God has shown us time and time again how this happens. It gives me encouragement that I can be used for amazing things. I need to be willing to try new experiences, break the mold and not get stuck in the norm. Extraordinary experiences help us to become renewed in purpose and mission.

Transformative God, help me change the ordinary into extraordinary. Amen 

July 20^th

Renew

 Recently I was talking to someone about college and they shared with me an article on how gender neutral restrooms is becoming norm on many campuses. When I was an undergrad I lived in communities for 2 years where we had this in our bathrooms. It was interesting sharing a bathroom space with 20 men and women. There were issues of not putting toilet seats down, hair being left in the shower and amount time being spent to get ready in the actual bathroom. The whole experience taught me (among other things) that gender doesn't make you cleaner or messier, worse or better.

Since then I keep this experience in my mind. I try to not make generalizations about gender. I have male friends that are cleaner than female friends and female friends who know more about sports than their male counterparts. When I was researching marriage vows a while ago I was disgusted with how many of the vows were gendered in those labeled as "Christian ceremonies". They weren't about being equally yoked but about giving into the authority of the male counterpart since they have been tasked with leading the household (yuck).

Like the experience with gender neutral bathrooms, and finding neutral gender vows I am reminded how time over time we are called to question these pre established systems of control. It is our job to continually question, challenge and argue against the systems being used to subject those socially seen as inferior. I hope that I can provide a place of welcome to all, regardless of gender, race and sexual orientation. I hope that I continue to stand for equality for all. I hope I can live out Jesus's command to love one another.

May we each continually challenge systems of oppression that control our interactions and reactions.

Holy one may I take actions to live out your kindom in this world through my actions and reactions. Amen